How the Ninth Month Went

Dear Zachary,

We have decided that you are the Chris Traeger of babies. Every day, you wake up with a huge smile (probably because you don't have to waste time sleeping anymore) and get going. And once you get going, you just don't stop. As Chris Traeger says, “If I keep my body moving, and my mind occupied at all times, I will avoid falling into a bottomless pit of despair.” (For you, that bottomless pit of despair is nap time.) You have become a ridiculously fast crawler, crawling almost as fast as Mommy and Daddy walk, and you can get into things you're not supposed to two seconds after we turn our backs. The result of this is that we have turned into Mad-Eye Moody: "Constant vigilance!"

So many pictures this month are blurry because you're crawling so fast. 

Not only do you have Chris Traeger's remarkably toned body (for a baby), you are just overwhelmingly positive about almost everything. You spend a significant portion of your awake time with a huge grin on your face and cackling at how funny everything is. Generally you love strangers (knock on wood) and are happy to be left at the church nursery because yaaaayyyy more people and new experiences! You are fine getting into your car seat when we're at home because you know it means going out to see the world, but if we're out at a restaurant or somebody else's home and you need to be buckled in, it's instant sadness because alas, we are leaving all the fun and exciting new things.

Of course, we could just say you're like Dug the Dog from Up ("Hello, I have just met you and I love you!"), but our family policy against dogs doesn't allow me to compare you to one. But we love Parks & Rec, so comparing you to Chris Traeger is acceptable.

I know I said last month that you were getting more and more fun, and that statement still holds true. Your infectious laugh and easy smile have won you the admiration of many random strangers. I feel so blessed that I get to be your mother, and can only thank God that He saw fit to put you in our family. My prayer is that you continue to be a blessing to others even as you grow older, and that you never lose that joy and passion for living.

love,
Mommy

New this month:

• Last month we feared for your life after you learned to crawl and stand, but not to stop and sit back down. After several long weeks of watching your every move and still somehow managing to fail at protecting you from all the corners, walls, edges, and floors in the house (read: every hard surface. Why don't we live in a padded cell like psychiatric wards?), you have finally stopped going to sleep every night looking like you've been in a battle. Now that you can carefully squat back down after standing (and we have moved or covered as many dangerous things as we could), we average only three "I hit something" wails a day, as opposed to thirty. 

• You moved to your own room! I was especially petrified about this since you were still waking three or four times a night, and the thought of trekking down the hallway to get you that many times was unbearable. Thankfully, after a few nights of adjustment, you now only wake up once, usually right before we go to bed, for a quick feeding and then it's back to sleep until 6:30 or 7 am. Hallelujah, God is good. 
• You learned how to scale the Lovesac. Now it's all fun-fun-silly-willy zipping up there and watching Mommy and Daddy rush over to stop you from trying to climb onto the desk from your new vantage point. 
• Finally, drinking water is a thing. I was beginning to worry that you would forever be dependent solely on breastmilk for hydration, as we tried progressively more and more expensive drinking vessels (free shot glass --> IKEA sippy cup --> disposable sippy cup --> Tommee Tippee sippy cup --> $8 Munchkin weighted straw cup finally won). I think the hot weather and your increased activity level helped a lot.
• First time on the swings: we thought you would love it, based on how much you love being swung around in the air by Daddy. Turns out what you loved was the Daddy part, and not the swinging itself, as you were ambivalent at best and slightly freaked out at worst. 

• You have five teeth! Oddly enough, the fifth one to come in was next to your top left tooth, and not on the bottom like all the books say should happen. I am beginning to regret our habit of sticking a finger into your mouth to sooth you when you get angry in the car. 
• We were brave/foolish and took you on your first plane ride! We went to San Diego to celebrate our fifth anniversary and decided to splurge on a luxury hotel. While the plane ride was a breeze (a helpful bachelorette party sitting behind us took it on themselves to play peekaboo with you the whole time), sleeping in a new environment was not. I feel (only slightly) bad for all the rich old retirees who were staying at the US Grant and had to listen to you screaming about the indignities of oh, not being allowed to play with glass and wires, or having to sleep when it's 1 am. It was also the first time we left you with a non-friend/non-family babysitter, but you did just fine and we made it up to you by letting you have some of our Marine Room leftovers the next day. Are we spoiling you by letting you have such high-class experiences on your first vacation? Maybe, but it all evens out in the end because Daddy has decided that such a harrowing experience means you're not traveling again until you're five...just kidding. Sort of.

First plane flight, and you're all prepared with your barf bag!

Making food art on the Grant Grill's nice tablecloth.

New hotel room = endless things to explore.

Making new friends!

Likes: 

• Food: still avocado and blueberries, plus mac& cheese (is there a kid who doesn't like mac&cheese?), potatoes, fresh mozzarella, black beans, and the Marine Room's braised beef cheek. You have good taste, my son. 

• Entropy:  The joys of pulling every book off the shelf and every toy out of the bin have been discovered! It only takes you about three minutes to make your room look like a mess. The best part is that your colorful floor mat works perfectly as camouflage for colorful baby toys, so we are constantly stepping on/tripping over various books, cups, rattles, etc. I guess it's a good thing you have your own room, so it's all mostly contained?

• Toys: this month, the best toys are your IKEA stacking cups (you squeal with excitement when we make towers for you to knock over), the CCHS luggage tag, and the (unopened) tube of California Baby diaper rash cream.

• The ceiling fan: you were so mesmerized when we first turned it on, your head kept circling back and forth trying to follow the blades, and then you fell over while sitting (that hasn't happened in a long time!) because you were so busy looking up. 
• Chatting about new experiences: you've never been one for babbling, but maybe that's just because there wasn't anything worth discussing? We went to SD and suddenly you just would not stop talking! The first hour in the hotel was nonstop "Dab dab dab dab dab dab dab dab dab! Mmmm! Aaaahhhh ehhhh!" 

Dislikes:

• The official worst thing in the world: brushing your teeth. You are generally a cheerful, smiley baby, until we try to stick a bristled torture instrument into your mouth. Then it's full meltdown mode, complete with hysterical screaming, back-arching, and head tossing. Even Baby Einstein videos don't work as distraction, and normally you're mesmerized by screens. Considering the wide variety of items you've stuck into your mouth, I just don't understand what's so bad about a toothbrush. I thought diaper changes last month were bad, but that was nothing compared to this. 
• That's about it! As I said earlier, you are generally a happy, good-natured baby. 

Even when Mommy and Daddy do silly things like put you into the Marine Room bag just to see if you'll fit.

Animals you resemble: 

• A koala: you love clinging to us the way a koala does to a eucalyptus tree. It's really cute how hard you hug, until you start pinching. 
• A raccoon: just like how they like handling their food before eating, you pass your food back and forth from hand to hand, even holding it up to examine it from all angles, before you finally shove it into your mouth. 
• A dog: despite our family's official policy of not believing in dogs, you are all too happy to behave like one: chewing up shoes when you can get them, eating scraps off the floor if you find them, and carrying around toys in your mouth as you crawl around (although your Auntie Emily helpfully points out that this could actually be considered a pirate-with-a-knife type of move). 

• A cat: anything that is specifically meant for you is automatically not interesting, by virtue of us having spent money and/or time in preparing it for you. Toys bought specifically for you? food prepared just for you? Nope, not having any of it. Things that we most want you not to get into, though...those are immensely fascinating. It's uncanny how Walnut knows when an article of black clothing is set down and how you know where the most dangerous objects are. Also like your big brother, you are supremely interested in the contents of his food bowl. Looks like it's time to start putting it up on the counter...

How the Eighth Month Went

Dear Zachary,

I never used to pay much attention to the news. When I was in the sixth grade, I somehow got put into my last-place elective choice, Current Events, and barely earned a C because I couldn't be bothered to keep up with what was going on in the world. Also the only news source in the house was the Wall Street Journal, and I'm sorry, but an 11 year old, no matter how precocious of a reader, isn't going to be digesting much about the stock market. Now, though, it seems I can't help hearing about every single dangerous thing that could happen/has happened to babies, and stories about babies being killed, either accidentally or purposefully, seem to dominate my Facebook news feed (seriously, FB algorithms, you need to get out of my head). Those kinds of things never used to bother me much, but now I inevitably tear up when I read about that poor little ___-month-old who was ____ed so much that he ____ed.

Probably not a helpful thing to reread during this time: World War Z. Many of the stories in that book are heartrending stories (okay, I'm the only one whose heart is being rent) about parents and children, and although the logical T side of me knows that a zombie apocalypse is unlikely, I can't help but waver between 1) wondering if we should replace the sliding glass door in our bedroom with something more solid, 2) worrying that we don't have any axes or other tools that could be used to kill zombies, and 3) thinking that I really should always have at least half a tank of gas and a disaster preparedness kit in my car. Only the last one is a really productive thought. And in reading speculative fanfiction for WWZ, one link led to another and I ended up watching this short film, which reduced me to tears for minutes and stayed with me for a couple of weeks. I couldn't stop alternating between thinking about how I would do anything to keep you from harm, and worrying that I won't be strong enough to do what it takes if the time ever came.

I'm not really sure where I was going with all that, but let me end this month's letter by saying that man, that maternal drive to protect one's babies is strong! It's really hard for me to figure out where the fine line is between letting you crawl around and explore to your heart's content (and bonk your head more than a few times in the process) and holding you back so that you don't get hurt...but then I'm pretty sure that's a lifelong struggle for parents. Here's to hoping I get that balance more or less right in the years to come!

love,
Mommy

This month's updates were written by Daddy:

New this month:

In all the pictures in the previous months, you were simply sitting still or staying put and very content with doing so. How much has changed in the past month as you have begun to not only worm forward but also crawl around like an Olympic crawl sprinter! In the span of two weeks, you decided to transition from being stuck on all fours to sitting up from that position and then crawling in all sorts of directions. This leads to all sorts of problems with naps and sleeping as you want to practice crawling all the time, any chance you get. Because you've gone mobile, we can no longer just leave you in the activity center or on your blanket on your own. We turn to do something for five seconds and you're already halfway across the room looking for trouble.

Two days after you decided to crawl around, you decide to step it up another notch and begin to pull yourself up to try and stand on everything. From our legs to couch cushions, nothing is off limits for you to try and stand. You've even tried to pull yourself up using things that are either too short or too flimsy to support you (this includes a pair of jeans, your toy box, a paper bag, and floor pillows). You even try to stand up in your crib after we put you down. Our only hope is that you tire yourself out after realizing that there's nothing to hold onto.

Fun things you like to do now that you're mobile: 

• Sit up after you've decided to change directions when something else is going on 
• When you see an Apple device, you immediately begin to sprint crawl to wherever it is 
• Try and touch the wall heater when you get into the hallway (responsible adults who are reading this: don't worry, it's been shut off) 
• Pull up to stand using boxes and pretending like you're a bartender 
• Crawl to where you're not supposed to be to grab things you're not supposed to touch, e.g. to the bathroom to touch the trashcan full of used q-tips and floss, to the closet to suck on Daddy's sweaters, to the kitchen to lick flip-flops or tip over the graywater bucket...thankfully you haven't discovered Walnut's litter box yet. 

"What can I say? I aim to misbehave, after all!"

Food:

We are so glad that we decided to go with baby-led weaning, as it makes things so much easier. You've done an amazing job of learning to pick up even tiny pieces of food (blueberries, puffs, rice) and depositing it into your tiny mouth. Your progress has been amazing and you've progressed from when we started in early April with simple foods such as soft apples and pears, to now eating fish cake and bulgogi with us at the Korean restaurant, naan and saag and dal at the Indian restaurant, and homemade gnocchi. This has made eating out so much more enjoyable as a family activity and you love to be included in the festivities. All this eating has also made your BMs a lot more regular with an average of three huge poops per day.

Teeth: 

I'm sorry your teeth have to come in. It's a part of life and it sucks. I wish you were born with a full set of teeth so you didn't have to deal with this pain and itchy gums (Mommy inserts here that she is glad that you weren't born with a full set of teeth). Actually, your first three teeth didn't seem to bother you much, leading to us thinking that this whole teething thing was no big deal, but we seem to be making up for it with this fourth tooth, which has been sprouting with a vengeance. Sadly, it's been keeping you up at night and making you extra chompy while nursing. We hope that the rest of your teeth aren't like this.

Look at those two tiny bottom teeth!

Likes:

• Avocado (you can pound half an avocado + other foods in one meal) and blueberries (such fantastic hand-eye coordination already!), plus the old standby of corn on the cob.
• Making a mess with your food and pounding the high chair when the service isn't fast enough: the messiest foods are definitely avocado, sweet potato, peanut butter, and corn. 
• Moving anywhere: see above. 
• Being thrown up into the air: this is getting harder and harder, though, as you get heavier. We are pleased to announce that all that avocado has finally gotten your weight increasing again and you are now a pleasant twenty pound kettlebell. 

• Destroying towers of blocks or cups: nothing is allowed to stand tall. If it's stacked, it personally offends you and you must go knock it down.
• Your big brother Walnut: whenever you see him, you want to crawl over and grab his fur (Walnut does not like you as much as you like him), his toys are way more fun than yours (you are more interested in his catnip ball than he is), and when he jumps up onto his cat tree you laugh like crazy.   

• Dancing to the Sandra Boynton songs, especially Barnyard Dance and The Bunny Rabbit Show. You make this fantastic face with a huge open smile frozen in place. 
• Making loud noises: whether by banging on the piano, banging on boxes, or whacking those plastic air bags that come in Amazon boxes, the louder it is the better! Thankfully you have not yet discovered the power of your lungs. 

Your box of blankets makes an excellent drum. 

Dislikes:

• Leftovers! Like your daddy, you are not about eating a food after two meals of it. Your mommy went to all the trouble of making a bunch of banana pancakes and meatballs for you for easy meals, but you won't have anything to do with it. Of course, that's Murphy's Law at work. Our meals, though -- those are always interesting! 

I can't have your food?? Whyyyy are you so cruuuuellllll?

• Staying in one place (and this includes your carseat now): you have the patience for about a 15 minute car ride now, after which if you aren't asleep or out, you start screaming 
• Any kind of personal grooming: getting your daggers-for-fingernails clipped, lotion put on post-bath, and let's not even talk about wiping your face after a meal - trying to get you to hold still is one of the hardest things in the world. It's like performing surgery on a turbulent plane.

"Put on a diaper? No way...I'm outta here!"